Friday, March 30, 2007

Dawn

PBAdams always pesters me to write more poetry. So, here's a stab in the dark at an early morning haiku.


Cat rubs against sleepy legs
Child laughs with tired eyes
Morning breaks

2 comments:

P.B. said...

You complain but you know in the end it's good for you. Otherwise why do it? ;)

Just one thing about this:

"Cat rubs against sleepy legs"

Is Cat a nickname or a literal cat and who's legs are getting rubbed against? His? Yours? The child's?

Tis in the spirit of haiku mostly but for it to be a proper Haiku what you want is a great deal of clarity. Precision.

Good job. Keep after these. Thanks.

Roust said...

I didn't find any problem with the clarity of the first line. I hate haiku, but didn't see anything wrong with it.

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