The little bird of my sorrow
wears a length
of twine about one leg
which curiosity forbids me
to question. So I wonder
wordlessly as he stands
just beyond the pane
of my only window
just preening himself
meditatively
or contemplating
some unfinished task.
Curiosity says
he can not say
because the answer
would only make me
paranoid
which is his way
of making me
more paranoid.
Curiosity is my blind
tormentor.
7 comments:
I was surprised to see that your name was attached to this poem. You seem to be getting away from your normally image packed poetry and going for something that seems more literal, though it is far from literal (dare I say one-dimensional) in context.
I like that there is only one window. This serves to dramatise the isolation or compound it. I imagine a cell and that inside such a place confinement and entrapment exists. Also the bird seems undisturbed with its predicament and seems content to preen away, however such an image seems only to confuse the viewer and only seems to get him to question the birds present state linking back to the person confusion and inner turmoil.
Although as I said earlier it seems to be without your usual bear-like imagery it does contain a lot of depth. Yes, I like this a lot.
Thanks, Tiger. I do seem to be stuck in experimental mode which is better than no writing at all I suppose. I can't remember if you commented on Metaphor but it was much the same sort of thing. Maybe this is just the next phase of my insanity. God knows, not me. :)
This brings up that feeling of wanting to know something, but not sure if you really want to know.
Maybe it’s just my perspective but I wondered; why is the bird a he instead of a she? Don’t know if it matters, but the tone struck me that a she might fit better. Either way works well though.
I don’t know about a new phase so much as perhaps you are finding a new, or another voice to your work. Whichever it is, I like it.
-Steve
Thanks, Steve. This is an odd little piece I think. There is very definite meaning in every word including the gender of the bird believe it or not.
I know that much of this is personal or terribly obscure and I think it's likely that only someone with my particular brand of insanity would actually get this one. That's why I had some doubts about the value of this.
You're right about the curiosity part but I'm afraid it goes a good deal deeper and darker than that. My mind is very twisted at times.
Thanks very much for the patient reading of this. I hope your escape from Alabama goes well. :D
finding a new voice as a poet is a welcome thing. I don't see it as your next phase of insanity, just another phase of your journey as a poet.
I commented on metaphor, but I do prefer this one. Thanks for this ;)
Great poem! I'm happy to hear you're experimenting more and making stuff like this.
"Curiosity says he can not say
because the answer
would only make me
paranoid which is his way
of making me more paranoid."
I thought this part was a bit out of-flow or however you call it because of the repetition of the word 'paranoid' so closely together, maybe it'd just be better without the last sentence?
"Curiosity says he can not say
because the answer
would only make me
paranoid which is his way."
Or some other sentence to follow it?
I very much like how you're toying with 'curiosity' and the bird image. I immediately thought of the expression; "curiosity killed the cat". Without the cat (victim of curiosity), the bird (mental state, sadness) has more chance to live. But maybe I'm interpreting this wrong.
Anyway, good piece! I enjoyed reading it.
Thanks to all of you for the great comments. I was just reading them over again and realized what had been bugging me so much about this one! A couple of poor line breaks and the stanzas were all wrong I think...
Hopefully I've managed to fix it. Thanks again for your help!
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