So I got a little bit arty tonight...I'm sure I'll recover by tomorrow. :)You will paint a woman,
a stranger, using only blues
and greens, surreal and vivid
as spring in snow country.
You scoff at this fortune,
but look, it is already coming
true. Are you not even now
imagining the shards of silhouette
cast by her angular features,
her nipples, her elbows, the almond
corners of her questioning eyes?
Is she not as soft as life running
wild and green in lea meadows,
as nude as raw blue waters
running through the brooks
of your imagination?
Have you not imagined
her concrete form
in abstract dreams? Savored
the spice of knowing her
yet not knowing? Her needs
displayed, but muted by blind
canvass that cannot capture
fires banked deep within.
You will pack up your brushes
and turn away, but can write
your senses clean again
with morning breaking rose
light over empty glass.
3 comments:
I liked the ironic tone very much; the fact that at times we just can't help ourselves, and the unexpected, the ridiculous, ends up being the truth.
There's a teasing tone too, just right, not maliciously mocking but poking a little, in the second stanza, (which makes a sudden turn away from the first stanza's direction; I liked that too).
Later;
'yet not knowing? Her needs
displayed, but muted by blind
canvass that cannot capture
fires banked deep within.'
'Canvass' is the apex, I think.
Canvass as in, 'examine carefully; scrutinize'? Her needs are obvious, there for anyone to see, but not by this person who is blind to her deepest emotions and so cannot truly know her.
Or canvas as in 'the fabric used to render a painting'? Then the painter cannot hope to capture her entirely because the medium is lacking - but not the painter. Huge distinction.
I especially liked the last stanza.
'You will pack up your brushes
and turn away, but can write
your senses clean again
with morning breaking rose
light over empty glass.'
I love the 'write your senses clean again...' Write...not paint or talk or whatever else.
My first impression of double meanings was reinforced with subsequent readings. I just haven't decided if you wrote them intentionally or not. :)
The instructors/teachers voice is coming out in this once again.
Theamak said a lot of it - the irony, the teasing tone.
I do not know if I am correct with this but I can sense the conflict and the continuing refusal to give up - though paint brushes are packed away - you can write which at times can more powerful and visual than paint - it soothes. cleans and heals resulting in words painting a picture of their own.
Once again your poetry is visual and inspirational. Cheers!
Thea, I think you have inspired me to write another of my essays on poetry. That's good. At least from my point of view it is.
I had some concerns with this one about the tone and also about whether or not I was being too clever with some of the word play. I know that you are very smart, but I think the fact you picked out just about every bit of that in this shows me I needn't have worried. :D
Tiger, you were also dead on with what you observed. Thanks.
Thanks to both of you. You showed me that this one is worth saving and not just another of my pointless little word games. Sometimes I get carried away with the game.
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